Both Halves of A Boss Babe

I haven’t been posting much. Want to know what I’ve been up to? Okay I’ll tell you.

I’ve been falling back in love with ME. Yup, that’s right. I have been taking more time for myself, my self-care and my dreams more than I’ve ever been comfortable doing in my LIFE.

And it’s still not super comfortable and it still feels super weird. The concept of investing in myself, taking time to re-source, and to fully accept, no, CELEBRATE! ALL parts of me, as a means to serving better, being a more powerful woman, human global citizen, fitness coach and friend – is still kind of a brain-twister for me!

And I know I’m not alone. So many of us were raised to deny our own needs, that the way to a pure heart was to give and give and give selflessly and relentlessly, leave just about enough time for sleep, a shower and a TV show re-run, and that’s about it each day. (How exhausting.)

But ladies if I can impress upon you how SMALL that makes us all play – this is what I am finally discovering now, after all these years.

You see, being a Boss Babe is not about working yourself to the bone. It’s definitely about working hard, no doubt about that, but working hard with an extremely strong WHY behind all that you do. Working hard on a mission and a purpose that you are passionate about, that you care about, then taking frequent breaks for self-care and sacred acts of self-love.

I am learning that a Boss Babe without the self-care… is just a boss.  The babe comes in with pampering, with the nurturing of her relationship with herself. And I don’t about you, but I recently realized something so profound, but so simple at the same time…

I don’t want to be a boss anymore. It’s counterintuitive. Being a boss will keep burning me out until I have nothing left to give. I want to be a Boss Babe. I am a woman, not a man, and not a worker bee, and I am finally realizing that I have needs that have to be met. It is not a negotiation anymore. It is a requirement. Or none of my dreams will ever come true.

For a queen, the actual work is only half of the equation for accomplishing things. The other half is the self-love. I had to let that truly land in my psyche.

I know I am not alone when I say, hard work is no problem for me. I love to work hard. There are so many other women out there who do too, it’s like we are all so addicted to hard work because we are terrified to stop and take a break to love ourselves because deep down we feel we are not worthy of this. So better just keep working, so no one raises an eyebrow and we can continue hoping to get the acceptance, love and validation we seek externally through our work.

But I’m here to tell you, you are worthy. You don’t have to DO anything more to become more worthy. And the external validation will seem really silly and unimportant once you start giving yourself all the self-love you can possibly receive. 

If you have any parts of your life that are in transition right now, double down on your self-care. Level up immediately on your acts of self-love. 

If you are a Boss Babe that has been on her grind and the babe part of your title feels like it is starting to fade, stop what you are doing ASAP and readjust your strategy. Re-position your crown if it is feeling heavy. Remember, YOU have to do it, no one else can, that’s why it’s called self-love. And you CAN do it – that inherent ability to call the shots in your own life is what makes you a Boss Babe.

Also, I think my biggest mistake, was thinking falling in love with myself was a one-and-done job. How silly, right? But I think I really convinced myself of this a few years ago. That I fell in love with myself, so I’m good now, right? Can I go back to work now? Lol.

But it’s just like when a couple falls in love, they need to keep showing up and filling their love bank account. They can’t just do go on one date, or say I love you once, or only take one selfie together JIn order to keep that love alive and thriving they must continue to nurture and invest in it.

Even though I completely got this on a logical level I never stopped to apply this logic to my relationship to self. I had stopped showing up for me (again). I had stopped giving myself time, space to heal, and doing things that make me feel beautiful for me, NOT for anyone else. It was time to have my own back again. I don’t want my self-care to ever fall by the wayside again. I am truly learning how important this it.

This picture is of me salsa dancing last week. My instructor took it. This is one of the things I picked back up again to level up my Boss Babe status. I challenge you other Boss Babes out there today to do something just for you too, with no aim or purpose other than to show yourself love and feel good in your own skin. Comment with any color heart emoji if you are committed to doing this.